I was in my 50s before I realized how the emotional aspect of my life related to being a disciple of Jesus. Painful experiences, including my failure as a young husband and father, led me to think that everyone in my life—even the staff I was responsible for in Beirut, Lebanon—would be better off if I were not around. I was shocked to be considering suicide, but there it was.
The Lord talked me out of suicide by taking me to Gethsemane in Mark 14:34–36, communicating that since it was not characteristic of him to quit in difficult times, so it should not characterize his children either.
Then, years later, I came across Isaiah 53:4,5. It became wonderfully clear that when Jesus died on the cross, He carried not just our sins but also our sorrows—the emotional dimension of redemption. We don’t have to be crushed by our sins because He carried them. The same is true of our sorrows. Now when I hurt, I say something like: “Lord, you know this hurts, but I thank you that you already carried this sorrow 2,000 years ago and you don’t intend for me to be crushed by it. So I give it back to you.” The restoration of peace is amazing.